Changing Tyler-Chapter Nine

I phoned Mom, first thing. I called the diner and got Hank, the owner on the phone. I explained that it was an emergency, and heard him call for my mama.

“Tyler? Are you ok? What’s wrong?” mom sounded panic-stricken. I at no time called the diner unless it was serious.

I quickly explained what had happened, although I left out certain details like my having been hit by a car and finding Billy undressed in a motel room.  I only said her that Billy had been rushed to the hospital, that this chab was unconscious, and that I would probably need a ride home that night. that babe agreed to swing by the hospital after her shift to pick me up.

The nurses wouldn’t let me in to watch Billy.  I saw his parents come in an hour or so later, clothed in expensive coats and looking like they’d just stepped off the cover of Vogue magazine. They disappeared into Billy’s room for about fifteen minutes, in advance of leaving. They not ever said a word to me, even though I was sitting right there in the waiting room across the hall.

I kept checking at the nurses’ desk, but they wouldn’t give me any information other than “It’s serious. He’s in critical condition.”

I knew what “critical” meant. It meant that there was a possibility Billy might not make it. What would I do out of him? this chab was my best ally. this chab knew everything there was to know about me, and even though that guy could be flaky sometimes, and self-absorbed, and could make me angry, this chab was still like a brother to me. I didn’t crave to lose him. I didn’t crave him to die.

What had these bastards given him? Drugs? Alcohol? one as well as the other? Why had Billy been stupid enough to take ’em? this chab was smarter than that. Exactly what kind of a party had it been that he’d ended up naked and unconscious? Had Robbie been there? Had he stayed for the party? The merely one who I knew would tell me the answer to these questions was Billy, and that guy wasn’t talking.

Dylan stayed with me until my mommy got there. mama immediately spotted the bruises and scrapes that I’d all but forgotten about in the rush to acquire Billy to the hospital. We had to undergo the third degree, until she was gratified that I was okay and had been telling her the truth about the accident.

“I have to go, Tyler,” Dylan told quietly, after my mommy had settled down. “You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks for everything, Dylan.”

“No prob. Call me if you hear anything, okay?”

“Yeah. Thanks again.” this chab left, and even though my mommy was sitting with me, I felt alone.

It had been six hours since we’d brought Billy in when one of the nurses finally took pity on me. “Look, one quick peek and then you’re going to go home and acquire some sleep. His condition was downgraded to ‘stable.’ He’s sedated, but he’s going to be fine,” she said, offering the first smile I’d seen all night.

My mommy and I followed her into Billy’s room. this guy looked so tiny, like a little kid lying there, covered with a thin white blanket and hooked up to an IV and a scarcely any other machines. he looked pale, much greater amount so than usual, with black smudges below his eyes.  In the dimmed light of the room, even his bright red hair looked washed out and faded.

mommy put her arm around my shoulders as we looked down at Billy, watching him sleep for a during the time that. At least I’d seen with my own two eyes that this guy was alive. There was no thing else I could do for him.

Now at least, I knew what the feeling of foreboding I’d been having was all about. Billy had nearly died. It couldn’t’ get worse than that, right?

So why did I still feel like something was wrong?

I went to school the next morning under protest.

How could I be expected to concentrate on school work when my best bud was lying in the hospital? Besides, I had been in an accident myself the day in advance of. You’d think that would have bought me a get Out of Jail Free card, but no. mom fixed me with that spooky look mammas receive when they know you’re pouring it on, angling for a day off. she hadn’t said a word, just stared at me, until I lastly rolled my eyes and hustled off to shower and costume.

you just can’t stand against that look, u know? Not without a crucifix and a bottle of holy water, in any case.

The hours dragged by. I could swear that I could hear every tick of the big wall clock that sat over the door in every classroom. Dylan waved to me at lunchtime, but this chab was sitting with his friends across the room, and I didn’t feel comfortable going over there. I didn’t know them, they didn’t know me. Besides, I really just wanted to be alone. I sat at the table I usually shared with Billy, feeling too upset to eat. After a while, I left, and walked around the grounds until it was time for class once more.

The afternoon didn’t pass any faster than the morning had.

One look at me and my bumps, scrapes, and bruises had the tutor sending me home. “No practice today, not with that limp,” he’d told. That was precious – I didn’t want to run, in any case. In truth, I’d limped a little more than necessary, just so that the tutor wouldn’t let me practice.

I looked for Dylan before I left, but couldn’t find him. Maybe he was still in the dressing room. I wanted to tell him that I’d seen Billy before I’d left the hospital night before, and to thank him again for going out of his way to drive me around.

I glanced at my wristwatch. If I hurried, I could catch the four o’clock bus for downtown, which would drop me off merely a pair of blocks from the hospital. I hurried around the side of the school throughout the parking lot, toward the bus stop.

A car pulled up next to me, beeping its horn. It was Dylan.

“What are you doing here?” I asked, surprised to see him. “Why aren’t you in practice?”

“I ditched practice. Hop in; I’ll drive you to the hospital. That’s where you’re going, right?” this chab grinned.

“You…ditched practice? Dylan! u have a scholarship on the line. You’d better receive back there and-”

“Shut up and acquire in,” that guy said, laughing. “One missed practice won’t kill me or hurt my stats. Hurry up, in advance of someone spots me. I’m supposed to be going straight home with explosive diarrhea.”

I laughed, sliding into the seat next to him. “Thanks for the visual, pal. Why are you skipping practice? Billy’s stable. I looked for you before to tell u. Maybe u should go back, have a miraculous recovery or something.” I didn’t wish Dylan screwing up his scholarship chances over this. Billy was my friend, but Dylan barely knew him.

“Nah. It’s wonderful. That’s fine to hear about Billy, though. Did you talk to him? find out what happened?”

“No. They sedated him. that guy was still sleeping when I left.”

Dylan nodded, shifted, and steered the Mustang into the street.

The going was a lot slower than it had been the night previous to cuz of rush hour traffic. It took us not quite a half-hour to acquire to the hospital parking lot. I had a sense of deja vu as we walked from the car to the hospital’s emergency room entrance, that weird feeling you acquire that you’d done exactly the same thing before.

We were said by the nurse at the desk that Billy had been transferred to a private room. private room. His parents’ attempt at caring, I thought. Well, I thought, at least they’d done that much for him. They’d merely stayed with him for less than an hour final night. I was bitter and I knew it. I hadn’t forgotten his dad’s attitude when I’d called him to ask where Billy was.

His room was on the 5th floor, at the end of the hallway. The door was open, so we walked straight in. Just as I’d figured, his parents weren’t there. The room smelled like disinfectant, sharp and almost also clean.

“Hey, Billy,” I said softly as we stood next to the couch. that guy looked a little better than that guy had the night previous to – not as pale, although the smudges were still below his eyes. The remains of his lunch sat on a tray next to the bed, untouched.

“What are u doing here?” Billy asked, blinking up at me. “What’s that guy doing here?”

“Be admirable. Dylan drove my butt all over city yesterday looking for you. What were u thinking, Billy? What happened? What did they do to u in that motel? Why didn’t u call me? Was it Robbie? Didn’t I tell u this chab was bad news?” every question I’d been chewing on since Saturday night came flying out of my mouth, nearly out of my taking a breath in betwixt. I couldn’t aid it – I was likewise relieved to hear Billy’s voice anew.

“Nothing happened. I’m fine,” Billy said, his voice sounding a little raspy.

“Bullshit! Billy, u almost died!”

“Look, can we talk about this later? I’m sort of busy being attached to IVs and machines, and having nurses stabbing my arse with needles every five minutes.”

“Billy, I deserve to know,” I snapped back. I didn’t care that the nurses were using his gazoo as a pin cushion. He’d put me through Hell, and I wanted some answers.

“Not now.” this guy said it to me, but his eyes were on Dylan.

“Look, I’ll be out in the hallway if u need me, Tyler,” Dylan told. he walked out, and I felt angry and insulted on his behalf.

“Billy, he’s been actually nifty about all of this. He’s the one who drove me to the motel to look for you, to the hospital-”

“You were at the motel?”

“We’re the ones who discovered you, u jerk! If it wasn’t for Dylan driving me out there, calling 911, you’d be dead!”

“How did u know where to discover me?” I should have caught the tightness in Billy’s voice, the suspicion, but I didn’t. I was too angry.

“Dylan drove me to Home Depot and we had a talk with Robbie.”

“You talked to Robbie? Oh, my God! Did he ask about me? Did that guy say anything? If you pissed him off, Tyler, I swear to God I’ll kill you!”

I wasn’t worried that Billy would hurt me. In his condition that guy couldn’t kill anything but time, but that wasn’t the point. How could this chab be angry with me? I was the one who’d saved his sorry a-hole. Robbie had been the one who’d put it in that mangy motel room to begin with, and had left him there half-dead!

“No, he didn’t ask about u. As a matter of fact, at first that guy denied knowing you at all! What kind of a chap does that, Billy? What do you watch in him?”

“You wouldn’t understand.”

“Try me.”

“Look, I actually like him, okay?” Billy said, looking away. “Okay, ok. I lied to you. I said u that Saturday night was my first date with him, but that wasn’t true. I’d gone out with him in advance of then.”

“Why didn’t u tell me?”

“Because I knew you’d find a way to stop me, that’s why! After Saturday, I was hoping it would be also late, so I figured I could tell you.”

“What the Hell are u talking about? What do u mean, ‘too late’? likewise late for what?”

“He’s positive, Tyler.”

“Positive about what?”

Billy sighed, rolling his eyes as if I were dense. “Positive, Tyler. He’s seropositive.”

It took me a moment to understand, to wrap my mind around the word. Then I felt all the blood rush from my head to my feet. For a minute, I thought I was going to either pass out or throw up. “He’s got HIV?”

Billy swatted at me as if I were an annoying mosquito. “Shut up!” that guy hissed. “Do u crave the entire world to hear u? Yeah, he’s positive, and with a little bit of luck, now I’m positive, too.”

“Oh, my God! You’re nuts! What were you smoking at that party, Billy?  Do u even hear yourself?”

“I didn’t think you’d understand! I love him, Tyler. I wish to be with him. I don’t crave to worry about getting it.”

“You’re crazy!”

“No, I’m not!” Billy struggled to sit up. His face was screwed up into an angry mask. This wasn’t the Billy I knew – this was someone else wearing Billy’s skin. “He’ll accept me if I’m positive, too. He’ll wish to be with me. Look, we’re gay. We’re going to acquire it eventually, and it’s not a big deal anymore, anyway. There are drugs for it, now. He-”

“I can’t listen to this shit anymore,” I said, backing up a step. “How did this guy manage to screw your head up this badly? I may not have the experience you have with guys, but I’ve done my homework, Billy. Becoming infected with HIV isn’t inevitable. It’s preventable, for God’s sake! How could u be so stupid?”

“I knew u wouldn’t understand! get out! Leave me alone!”

“Billy, did you tell the doctors-”

“GET OUT!” this guy roared. His voice was like a slap in the face. I felt stunned, and hurt, and greater quantity than anything else, confused. I backed away, refusing to turn my back on him, as if this chab were rabid dog that might attack me from behind if I did.

This wasn’t possible! What he’d said didn’t make any sense. HIV was preventable! Why the Hell would that guy want to catch smth that was going to kill him? Maybe the doctors had him drugged up. Yeah, that must be it. he wasn’t thinking clearly. he wasn’t rational. It was all some mad dream.  I had to believe that, ‘cuz if this guy was serious about what that guy was saying, Billy had just admitted to me that this chab was looking to commit slow suicide.

The thought scared me greater amount than anything else had in my entire life.